Sarah Hunt
High Wycombe
Food has never been a huge issue in our house. I try very hard to keep them away from junk
food, I enjoy cooking and we eat out. I
limit sweets, chocolate, chips, etc. but they do have them. My middle child (ie
the one who had the worst possible diet of the three when he was small) now eats
virtually everything and has a huge appetite.
He cites spaghetti bolognaise and cabbage as two of his most favourite
foods and is easy to feed. The eldest
also eats most things. He doesn’t have a
big appetite but isn’t fussy. He usually
eats less meat and more veg and given the choice would choose chips and
chocolate (wouldn’t we all) but again is easy to feed. Then there’s Ellen……NIGHTMARE CHILD – at
least when it comes to food!
Her appetite is barely enough to keep a flea
alive. Some days I have no idea how she
has any energy. Some days she eats quite
happily, others she eats nothing. Today
was a good day. She ate two boiled eggs
but refused the toast then changed her mind when we put marmite on it. She ate a tonne of tinned oranges for tea and
a small bit of pizza. She might eat the
bolognaise but not the pasta. Some days
she eats veg, most she doesn’t even touch it.
Do I have any answers? None! All I can say is that we don’t worry about it
and we don’t make her think it’s a big deal.
I never force her to eat anything.
I allow her to snack but only on fruit and even then she doesn’t eat
much. She’s average weight for her
height (she’s generally small but not thin), she has tonnes of energy, she
sleeps well and is a happy little soul.
Looking back, my brother was also a terrible eater. Bizarrely the things she eats mirror the
things he ate and, likewise, the things he refused are similar. Is it genetic to some degree? I have no idea but the similarities are
uncanny.
My advice is not to worry, not to stress and don’t
make a big deal of it. I always give her
a small amount of everything. Most days
it goes in the bin, but hey ho!
To help write this article I asked other NCT editors
for their thoughts and tips on coping with fussy eaters. Here are a few of the replies:
1.
Be relaxed and don’t make a big deal out of it. You can’t
force a child to eat (especially not a 4 year old) and there is nothing worse
than stressed mealtimes.
2.
Keep it simple: don’t worry about fancy cooking. I am a
hopeless cook and, with the best of intentions, I bought lots of toddler
cookery books and tried to create wonderful, tasty, healthy meals. I
failed (fishcakes sounded good but turned out a hideous greasy mush). I
now ignore the books and cook simple meals that I can cope with. It turns
out a roast dinner is not too difficult (as long as you get up early enough to
start it off) and my children now eat a huge plate of roast chicken, potatoes
and veg every Sunday.
3.
When you can, eat as a family at the table. The kids eat
much better when we all eat together. Both my children improved their
eating habits when they started having lunch at their pre-school (it was worth
paying for that extra hour) and had friends round for meals.
4.
Make a list of what they DO eat, rather than what they
don’t eat! My daughter eats very little meat and doesn’t like cheese,
yoghurt, milk or eggs. But she loves fruit and vegetables, so why should
I complain!
5.
Stick to what they like. My kids would quite happily eat the same meals
every day if it is something they like (in the same way they’ll have the same
bedtime story every night for a month). Although it seems boring to me, I
try to stick to their old favourites!
6.
Are they happy? Healthy? Full of energy? Then they must
be getting the nutrition they need!
7.
Make up stories around the
food. I made a mushroom sauce to go on chicken and didn’t take out the dark
brown flecks underneath, so the sauce came out quite grey. My daughter refused
to eat it until I told her that it was rat sauce made by the rat in ‘Ratatouille’
and then she wolfed the lot. To get her to eat curry, I made chicken korma and
told her it was Primrose chicken (made by Primrose in ‘Fifi and the Flowertots’).
8. Just accept that
they’re fussy! My first child is a very fussy eater and my second child is a
fantastic eater. I have done nothing differently with them, and I think it's
important to point out that sometimes it's not your fault. It's just the way
they are. I have tried EVERYTHING (and I mean everything) with my eldest, but
he is just plain faddy. I work around it now, and live in hope that when he's
older (he is now 5) he will be tempted to try other things. He is perfectly
healthy, sleeps well, has loads of energy, but has never knowingly eaten a
vegetable! It is a problem when he goes
to parties and on play dates, as he very rarely eats the healthy options on
offer but, again, I'm hoping that maybe one day he will want to fit in with his
peers. My advice is - don't stress about it. It may be temporary and, as long
as they are healthy, it isn't a big deal.
9. Get your child involved in preparing meals , even if it's just tipping something into a saucepan or stirring. Then make a really big deal about how they helped to make it. We tried a sticker chart but only limited success. I have the opposite problem with my son, 16 months, who is a non-fussy eater and will eat anything he finds on the floor: fluff off the carpet, biscuit crumbs and, in the summer, a dead bug. Nice!
10. Pick up on what makes them happy - e.g. my son wants to be a footballer and now firmly believes (quite rightly) that eating all of his fruit and vegetables and drinking water will make him stronger and a better player. And always encourage them to try even a small amount - they often find they do like it after all!
11.
Take away temptation! The most successful way of getting my son to
eat what I want is to leave the house. If we go to the park he will reluctantly
eat a banana if he accepts there is nothing better on offer and the food
cupboard containing the biscuit tin is over 15 minutes walk away.
Mark, Canterbury
I hope these stories from other parents help you if you have a fussy
eater. The key message seems to be NO
STRESS. Easier said than done…….
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